im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
She just used a chaser for red wine.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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