He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
