I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
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