forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
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