I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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