Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
