I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
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