I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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