We won't sleep together?
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Randomize
