sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
Do vagina's smell?
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Randomize
