What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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