There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
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