I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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