I am puke
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
i black out too much to be "responsible"
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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