I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
