there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
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