oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Randomize
