remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
