I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Randomize
