I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
