The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
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