In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
birth control should be required to get into college
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize