so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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