everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
