I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Randomize