Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Randomize
