People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Randomize