Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
either way he was missing a nipple.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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