found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Randomize
