New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
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