My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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