I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
is that a dick in a sweater?
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
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