I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
