I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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