you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
