you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Randomize
