u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
