I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
