i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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