Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
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