I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
Randomize
