I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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