I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize