dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I think your dad took our porno
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Randomize
