And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
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