last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Terrible idea I love it
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
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