Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Randomize
