i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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