i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
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