you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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